Sunday, April 10, 2011

Follow me

Thanks for your advice from last post, all helpful. I'm now basically doing as much as I can, in the way of speed, and backing off when things start to get ugly. I heard an excellent quote by Nate Jenkins in an interview with "Running Times Radio" something to the affect of... "Nobody ever got better/faster from any workout it is only ones ability recovery from training sessions that will make the difference" (between a champ and a chump).

I'll plug on with this in mind. What I wanted to write about today was "Twitter." I've had an account now for about 6 months and although I had little idea on how to use it, at first, I've certainly warmed to it and you will find me there, at least checking, almost everyday.

Just a little of my twitter history.

At first I thought it would be good to tell people what I was up to..

(Below actual tweets)

"At maccas having coffee before my run I'd ask what are the poor people doing but no need they're all here I'll ask them myself"

But that was not really what good tweeting is all about. Twitter is much better to help promote your business or interests..

"January 2011 races and locations in Japan are up on samurai running"

And or let people know you have just uploaded a new blog post..

"High mileage. The story so far..."

But the best part for me is that it gives me an outlet for my dreams of becoming a stand-up comedian. While I love running I think that if I had a wish I'd rather be Rodney Dangerfield than any elite runner. But sadly I may not have enough talent to be either. But I'll keep trying ;)

Below a collection of tweets, "funny or not" you be the judge!

Some are topical..

"Paul the Octopus, of World Cup prediction fame, has died. Now no idea who's going to win the World Cup? I suppose I could ask a scallop!"

"Canadian authorities investigate dog encased in block ice found on man's front lawn" say it may be linked to frozen turds on back lawn"

Some are personal..

"I'm not sure if I talk about my kids too much at the office but a guy at work did quit, saying he "wanted to see less of my family!"

Some a a mix of personal and topical (Mubarak's Egypt).

"My son understands Egypt after all he has grown up with calls of "Get out out old man" but I keep telling his mother I'm not going anywhere!"

"Teen Virgins on the Rise ... Nearly one-third of teens reported no sexual activity." looks like we've finally found some common ground"

Most of my tweets follow a theme like my recent ones of "Words that should be."

"Extra Teartestical" The effort exerted when running away from what you mistakenly believe to be an alien!"

"Whoredrobe" A large storage area where you keep things you don't want your wife to know about."

"Unplanned Parentwood" An unfortunate erection that spontaneously appears during a meeting with your child's teacher!"

"Stimuless Package" The grion region of the average married man!"

"Spare-condtioner": Those little left over packets of rinse left in the hotel rooms of bald men."

I won't give up my day job just yet but I'd like you to follow me on Twitter, at least humor me ;)


  1. I think your running and humor tweeting are both at the same level — good but not great. Keep plugging away and you may achieve greatness in one or the other, maybe even both!

  2. Thanks Bob,

    I always appreciate your hard but fair analysis.

    Sasuga "copywriter."

  3. I'm sure Ewen would say " if you wear your girlie arm warmers on stage at the comedy open night, you're go down a storm"!
    Some of your jokes are very funny and some go down like lead balloons.
    Keep working at it.
    Maybe you can buy the e-book 'Be a stand up comedian in a 100 days program' :]

  4. I find that I follow two groups of people that make me wonder about my personality. (I follow lots of local people as well but for different reasons). The two groups I follow are the American 'get out there and do it - you're the best!' types and the cynical, sceptical and sarcastic British. They're very funny and things like Tommy Cooper and Viz Top Tips are piss myself laughing funny - as only the English are.

    I also find the pro cyclists better than the distance runners at tweeting. Ryan Hall is all God, Sonia O'Sullivan and Paula Radcliffe are just boring - like your mother tweeting about doing the washing - while people like Cadel Evans and Nicholas Roche are great at delivering a 140 character summary of the pain.

  5. Scott, I liked your first tweets which said something along the lines of "my left nut is itchy, think I'll scratch it."

    It was you who got me onto Twitter, so I must thank you for that (can't thank you for any training advice - like "pink arm warmers will take 20 secs off your 5k time.")

    I've warmed to it too. Prefer it to FB as both a social network and a means of sharing information (and bad jokes). I've also un-warmed to the invasive aspects of FB.

    At first Twitter was a bit of a mystery, but the fog is clearing. I only just found out that 'threads of conversation' (@replies) can be followed (on 'new' Twitter) by clicking the word bubble. I also like the 140 character limit, which is a breath of fresh air after reading one of Thomas's posts. Funny, but I like that Blogger comments don't have a 140 character limit ;) It depends on who one follows as to how useful/entertaining it is. I'll keep following you as long as you limit the jokes to 3 good ones a day.